My blog

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Thu, 06 Dec 2012 20:25:14 -0600

Sometimes you’ve got to take substance(s) in order not to feel… And most of the time not...

Thu, 06 Dec 2012 20:23:50 -0600

Sometimes you’ve got to take substance(s) in order not to feel… And most of the time not feeling is the best feeling.

But dang, I wish beer didn’t have calories dude.

GAH!!

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 21:01:14 -0600

Gah indeed. I think my binges are starting to take a toll. On my weight that is; well other things too, but that’sobviouslythe worst.

So I’m stuck between really, full-throttle, trying not to B/P, or just doing itbetterso that I will once again loose weight regardless.

~~Sometimes I wonder how this happened~~…

oh boi

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 01:19:00 -0600

I have two finals tommorrow.

I am currently &%*!ing (use your imagination) around on Tumblr.

I drank beer (136 cal).

I took a benzo too. (An all night cram session being feasible-not so much now)

All of Subway and the other sordid foods may have not completely come out earlier.

FML

Maybe It’ll be ok:

I still have my thigh gap.

My knee is wider than my thigh.

I don’thave to eat.

Sweet

Yeah, so like, my weight

Tue, 04 Dec 2012 18:51:12 -0600

Height: 5’4”

CW: 90 lbs

GW1: 85 lbs

Gw2: 80 lbsG

GW 3: 78 lbs

GW 4: … That ackward moment when you don’t know if you’re more afraid of not losing weight or of dying in your sleep.

"■Every time you say “No thank you” to food, you say “Yes please” to thin. ■Thin is beautiful. Even..."

Mon, 12 Nov 2012 22:22:16 -0600

“■Every time you say “No thank you” to food, you say “Yes please” to thin.
■Thin is beautiful. Even thinner is perfection.
■Perfection is attained not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.”

why, oh why

Mon, 12 Nov 2012 22:13:00 -0600

whyyy the fuggg do i keep bingeing, well I know why, but there’s one thing I seem to forget when I get the urge… It makes me maintainn!! ugh. size 0 isn’t good enough;

I need to be a 00.

I need to be able to count my ribs.

I need to see more blue fingernails.

I need to be able to fly.

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Sat, 10 Nov 2012 02:34:00 -0600

Back...

Sat, 10 Nov 2012 02:12:00 -0600

I’m baaa-aaack.. Out of inpatient for a few months… Anyway I went about 3 mo. without Bingeing and/or purging, Yayy!!! Oh then I started again. Not cool! I feel so wretched now b/c I just did again tonight and I feel like I’m definitley maintaining if not gaining :/ Oh well that can change, right?

Height: 5’4”

CW: 97-ish??

GW1: 93

GW2:88

GW3: 85

for all you pro ana haters out there you have no idea what we’re going through.. we are not...

Tue, 24 Jul 2012 23:26:27 -0500

for all you pro ana haters out there you have no idea what we’re going through.. we are not choosing the disorder, but once it’s chosen us, sometimes we’ve gotta accept the facts; especially when youhavetried alternatives in the past. You just don’t know.. you have no freakin clue..

“Why? You want to know why?

Step into a tanning booth and fry yourself for two or three days. After your skin bubbles and peels off, roll in coarse salt, then pull on long underwear woven from spun glass and razor wire. Over that goes your regular clothes, as long as they are tight.

Smoke gunpowder and go to school to jump through hoops, sit up and beg, and roll over on command. Listen to the whispers that curl into your head at night, calling you ugly and fat and stupid and bitch and whore and worst of all, “a disappointment.” Puke and starve and cut and drink because you don’t want to feel any of this. Puke and starve and drink and cut because you need the anesthetic and it works. For a while. But then the anesthetic turns into poison and by then it’s too late because you are mainlining it now, straight into your soul.

Look in a mirror and find a ghost. Hear every heartbeat scream that everysinglething is wrong with you.

“Why?” is the wrong question.

Ask “Why not?”

-Laurie Halse Anderson

cals

Tue, 24 Jul 2012 23:21:24 -0500

is eating 150 calories tonight (total for the day) a lame excuse for not passing out on my 30 min drive to school tomorrow

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Tue, 24 Jul 2012 23:04:05 -0500

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Tue, 24 Jul 2012 23:03:34 -0500

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Tue, 24 Jul 2012 22:44:59 -0500

I swear i look like ive gained 5-10 lbs but that should be impossible on 300cals/day. sad part: i...

Tue, 24 Jul 2012 22:33:00 -0500

I swear i look like ive gained 5-10 lbs but that should be impossible on 300cals/day.

sad part: i feel like someone might be spiking my splenda with real sugar or somethign..

doc

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 22:32:04 -0500

So I went to the hospital the other day, they insisted on testing my gluclose (53) then brought some orange juice to make sure i didn’t pass out on the drive home. I drank like a quarter (more cals than I have for breakfast and lunch combined) and then he tells me… welll you’re not technically in the blacking out range so you’re good.

such wasted cals… doubleyouteeeff

is “dieter’s tea” a scam, and do any diet pills work????

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 22:19:01 -0500

is “dieter’s tea” a scam, and do any diet pills work????

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Sun, 22 Jul 2012 02:14:31 -0500

Now..

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 01:28:00 -0500

Height: 5’4
CW:87 LBS
GW1: 85
GW2 83
GW3 80
GW4 78
GW575
From there who knows.

I just ~~want~~ need to be able to count my ribs.

Student
22y/o

ask me anything …

About 2 weeks ago:

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 01:26:12 -0500

stats

Height: 5’4”

CW: 95 lbs

GW1: 90 lbs

GW2: 85 lbs

Ugw: ~~um 0?~~ not sure yet

How long have I had the ed? 2years